Parenting (and Living) From My Strengths
I am an idea person, and I thrive on new, creative ideas. So, naturally, websites like Pinterest and Etsy draw me in. I pore over magazines, read blogs, and feed my imagination. They inspire me to do creative, fun things with my kids, to create a home for us that is reflective of our history and interests, and to cook wholesome meals. We live in a fantastic time, one where ideas flow freely and sharing these ideas comes easily.
But today I feel deflated. In a creative mood, I've allowed myself to spend a little extra time scouting out new ideas and observing other people. There are some incredibly talented people out there: more creative, more patient, better writers, better housekeepers, and certainly better cooks than I will ever be. They've been successful in their attempts to do all of these things, and apparently (since they show up so often on Pinterest and google searches), they've been successful in sharing their successes. Do these people ever have a bad day? Do they ever discipline their child too harshly for failing to be quiet during rest time like I just did? Do they have to scramble to scoop up the toys laying around before their pristine photo shoots? Do their dishes pile up on Sunday afternoons when they'd rather sit on the couch with their husbands after a busy week than spend another hour on housework? And, if they did, would they still consider themselves successful?
When I feel deflated like this, I have to stop to think. I've been very open in sharing my life with others. Putting things out on the internet is an incredible asset, but it's so tempting to check for feedback, to see whether others have repinned my ideas, to compare the things I've posted with those of others. And I completely miss the point. If I post things here, it's for my sake, to remember these days. It's for my family's sake, so that they can stay in touch even when we're miles away. And it's to encourage other moms whose days are long and whose hearts are heavy at times, just like mine. Period. What I do with my children never needs to compare with what others do with theirs. I am not their mother, and they are not my children. My kids each have unique personalities, interests, and needs. I have a unique personality, interests, talents, needs, and calling. I am called to be the best version of myself that I can be. I am called to measure myself against God's standard and plan for my life--not against Pinterest. He has put my little family together because we are the best people for each other--when we are who he made us to be, and not trying to be something else.
I'm pulling myself up by the bootstraps today and taking a good look in the mirror. A look at me. I'm taking a good look at what God has to say about me--in the Bible, yes, but in the specific gifts, interests, and experiences he's granted me. He's given me pretty clear direction in these things. And for the time being, for the sake of my confidence, I'm unplugging. No more ideas, no more comparing, at least for a time. Instead, I hope to parent (and live) from my own strengths, based on my own family's needs, whether the results are Pinterest-worthy or not.
But today I feel deflated. In a creative mood, I've allowed myself to spend a little extra time scouting out new ideas and observing other people. There are some incredibly talented people out there: more creative, more patient, better writers, better housekeepers, and certainly better cooks than I will ever be. They've been successful in their attempts to do all of these things, and apparently (since they show up so often on Pinterest and google searches), they've been successful in sharing their successes. Do these people ever have a bad day? Do they ever discipline their child too harshly for failing to be quiet during rest time like I just did? Do they have to scramble to scoop up the toys laying around before their pristine photo shoots? Do their dishes pile up on Sunday afternoons when they'd rather sit on the couch with their husbands after a busy week than spend another hour on housework? And, if they did, would they still consider themselves successful?
When I feel deflated like this, I have to stop to think. I've been very open in sharing my life with others. Putting things out on the internet is an incredible asset, but it's so tempting to check for feedback, to see whether others have repinned my ideas, to compare the things I've posted with those of others. And I completely miss the point. If I post things here, it's for my sake, to remember these days. It's for my family's sake, so that they can stay in touch even when we're miles away. And it's to encourage other moms whose days are long and whose hearts are heavy at times, just like mine. Period. What I do with my children never needs to compare with what others do with theirs. I am not their mother, and they are not my children. My kids each have unique personalities, interests, and needs. I have a unique personality, interests, talents, needs, and calling. I am called to be the best version of myself that I can be. I am called to measure myself against God's standard and plan for my life--not against Pinterest. He has put my little family together because we are the best people for each other--when we are who he made us to be, and not trying to be something else.
I'm pulling myself up by the bootstraps today and taking a good look in the mirror. A look at me. I'm taking a good look at what God has to say about me--in the Bible, yes, but in the specific gifts, interests, and experiences he's granted me. He's given me pretty clear direction in these things. And for the time being, for the sake of my confidence, I'm unplugging. No more ideas, no more comparing, at least for a time. Instead, I hope to parent (and live) from my own strengths, based on my own family's needs, whether the results are Pinterest-worthy or not.
